Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Stepping out of the box

I've had it in my heart for a while to take myself on a cruise. I've always wanted to go but never allowed myself the pleasure, never made the time for - me. An Alaskan Cruise was always a dream and I had wanted to go for my 50th birthday but I didn't give in last year. When 2010 came around I recommitted to looking for a cruise and was looking for a Christian Cruise as I had made a recommittment to the Lord after a downward slip following the break-up of a long term relationship. I happened upon the Michael W. Smith and Friends Alaskan Cruise with Max Lucado, Matthew West, Natalie Grant and others and knew it was the cruise for me.

I recently got back from this amazing cruise. It was my first cruise ever and I went all by myself. There was a time as recently as 2 years ago when I wouldn't eat in a restaurant by myself. I just didn't feel comfortable, felt judged, thought being alone was not okay. My kids were on the verge of leaving the nest and I was grasping at straws, in a relationship that I knew was not healthy and feeling inadequate in many ways.

And so, this solo first time cruise was a step of faith in many ways. Faith in God and faith in myself. I knew I was blessed to even be able to go on a cruise in such economic times and I prayed fervently for God to show me what He wanted me to see, to teach me what He wanted me to learn...and He did.